When will you learn that we accept the love we think that we deserve?

Indeed speechless.

I don't know if I should even be talking about it at all but I know the more I try to avoid to talk about it to anyone - even myself - I will have to face it, talk about it, think about it someday. I just don't know how to. I wish I did. I just wanna prepare myself for it when it comes. And right now I'm avoiding it and also trying to prepare myself for the worst.

Why should I be doing so when I'm trying to avoid? Sometimes I feel like I make my own life difficult for myself. Like what I'm doing now. I need my life to get better. Much better. Not just fancy things, but real geniune things like myself, family, friends, finance and  my girlfriend. Not things I want anymore. Things that I live my life with every single day. It's okay if I don't get to carry branded bags or wear branded apparels in exchange for a better life. I just want my life to get better.

I don't wanna be this pathetic anymore.


Anyway, I didn't blog yesterday because I was too tired & I was home only at 1am. I was really knocked out after supper. I love being knocked out. I don't have to worry if I get to sleep or not hahaha!


So,
Woke up at 1pm and rushed to prepare to meet love
Plaza Sing for dinner at Pizza Hut
Movie timing suck, didn't suit our plan so no movies
Took a bus to Far East
Saw C but she didn't see me (Y)
Got some diy stuff and shopped around
Really wanna get something for myself but nothing caught my eye :(
Bumped into Varron :) who didn't said hi (PEACH LEH YOU!)
Argued over something so fucking dumb, and I was damn mad at her for not being understanding but after a while we were fine, holding hands already.
Paragon next. Gucci was busy. Wanted to get the tote bag and wallet but I was spoilt with choices, seriously. Ben Sherman got nice polo tees that bee should have! I'm encouraging her to buy when we really need to save up for my school fees (fuck u sch). I love Muji! Though their things are really overpriced but I still love Muji.
Went over to Taka. It was already dark and bee was asking me if we should find a place to sit down, have a drink. Couldn't decide where so we just walked around while thinking of a place. Bought donuts at Donut House for mom. Bumped into Jinman. Went to check the price of the films & Polaroid. Holga or Polaroid?
Settled down at Coffee Club in Kino. Ordered drinks and sherpard's pie which tasted bad. I still prefer country pie! :( I was still thinking of Lychee Jazz at TCC so I ordered Minty Lychee Tea Freeze which is bad as well. It tasted like a lot of milk with lychee!! :/ Bee got Green Apple & Mojito Mint. Not bad, quite nice. Tasted a bit like Lychee Jazz. We should've went for TCC instead, dammit
After that Zel texted to ask if I wanna go supper with them after their concert and I agreed. Which made us both really pissed off 'cos if her text came earlier we'd have went for TCC at Citylink!!!! Bitch. Whatever, it's over anyway.
Went to Esplanade! Long since I been there. To my amaze, hahaha it was our first time there together after being together for so long!! Zel & Che came after a while. Bee took bus home while we walked to the train station. Took the last train home & bought cup noodles at 7-11 :)

 

  

  

Dinner @ Pizza Hut

 

  

  

At Coffee Club

 

  

  

  

  

  

At Esplanade 

Sunday:
Woke up at 2pm! I was wondering why I've been sleeping for so long and no one said anything, no one made any noise. Oh only to wake up to realise that it was because dad told my maid not to wake us up too early as we slept very late the night before. Good job dad, thumbs up for you!

Cabbed to aunt's place and got Che's homework. We walked over to Mac's at Hougang Ave 8. We were so damn unlucky!
1. No seats
2. Finally got seats but no switch/cannot connect to wireless
3. Wanted ice-cream but machine broke down
4. Walked the entire area for ice-cream only to found none
5. Wanted to meet the folks for dinner but no parking lots

GOOD JOB GOOD JOB HOW UNLUCKY!

Dad came to pick us while Che & her mom went to take a bus back home. We had dinner at Buangkok, sent Gran home & home sweet home for us :)

Sorry, 'm having a bad night. Till then!

/Edit
I end up seeking comfort in her instead. I knew this was coming. I knew I had to talk to someone and that someone is her but I just didn't want her to worry and lose sleep because of me. Also, I didn't want her to be oversuspicious about what happened in the past. I should/will stop all that 'what about me?' conversations.

Thanks baby for staying up until 3am to comfort me and hear my whines, I love you :)