Why am I the one who's still crying?

"When you truly trust someone you care about, you don't have to wonder if they love you as much as you love them."

Funny thing is, I wonder about this everyday.


I know you don't love me as much as I love you. I can't blame you. Maybe I'm not the same girl that you fell in love with

/



Kelly Clarkson - Already Gone


This current earworm has been on repeat for 27 times and counting. The lyrics fits me very very well & it speaks of my emotions.


Please, I wanna be right where you are tomorrow. I need to be next to you, hand in yours wherever we go. I need the comfort. I don't wanna breakdown right now. I need to start Monday right so the week will be better than this..

#501 out of 1001 things I want in a lover: Someone who will do anything to see me, even if it's just for a minute

Current earworm: Lights - The Listening (Acoustic)

"Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop trying to figure out precisely how we feel, and stop deciding with our mind what we want our heart to feel. more often than not, sometimes we just have to go with 'whatever happens, happens'."

Wish I could..

Been crying for the past hour. Guess I don't deserve to be happy. My happiness is always so short-lived. Wished you lived a little longer in me, happiness, my dear.

Every day I think about you half as much as I did the day before. But I'll never stop thinking about you. Your name still roll off my tongue all the time, you're a topic that I'll always bring up in conversations. Do you know that?


I wanna feel better soon. I guess I kept so much inside of me, I cannot take it anymore. I don't wanna be this sad, I wanna be okay. Just okay. Never mind if I'm not happy, because this unhappy life I've been living, I'm getting so used to it. I guess I'll be strong enough to take it all.

God, please..

I presume if I did not think, I would be happier

Hazy (featuring William Fitzsimmons) - Rosi Golan

What if I fall & hurt myself, would you know how to fix me?
What if went & lost myself, would you know where to find me?
If I forgot who I am, would you please remind me?
Oh, cause without you things go hazy

My current earworm. I couldn't find it anywhere. Limewire sucks. Merl just recommended me to use eMule instead. Looks good but wtf ok takes damn long to connect and download! And now, cannot use. Why? Because no damn server to connect nb how to download songs!! :( And btw what's wrong with imeem!?

Stay home Friday afternoon, what did I waste my time with?
Camwhore (hehe)
Write notes for tdmc
Cleared my messy drawers
On the phone with J
Figure the Pet Society cheat (effin' lame ok bff thanks to you!!)
Search for new songs but to no avail
Chat with C over IM


By the way bff, I think you'll like that song too. Go listen to it okayyyy. (L)

Watching movie with J and her sis later at Causeway Point. Gonna watch the Hong Kong movie, All's Well Ends Well 2009. (Fuck a fucking bird just flew past the window it looked so close I got a shock!!!!) Fucking hate birds ughhhh ew!


Mom, can we stop already. I'm so sick and tired of it. I don't know how to keep us together anymore. I don't know how to keep pretending like I am okay with the arguments we get into everyday. I cannot pretend to be happy, to act like yes we're a very happy close knitted family when we are not. The distance between us, the more I try to come close, the further away we are. I no longer know if we are still called family. Do you still want us together? I'm not strong enough for this but I know I need to be strong for myself, for you all.


I hope this storm will blow by really soon mom, I can't take it anymore..


Something not so depressing, overdue photos!

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 Topshop Private Event 2009

 

I look fucking excited and wtf @ my fringe not being in place :(

  

B&J's luv 

  

  

The mineral water we got from the event so cute ^^

  

Adore my shoesssss

x x x

010209
That Sunday I spent with my two all-time favourite people.

 

Late night at Far East 

 

While waiting for bff to knock off

 

 

 

I'm gonna make everything nice nice pack my messy study table sit in the living hall watch telly wait for mama to come home so we can have dinner cos papa is away, not home for dinner with us tonight after dinner grab my bag spray Escada vain a bit and off to meet the ng sisters. I will blog tonight oteh with photos of Zetaime and Jenae heh heh. OK BAI xoxo