Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Happy 23rd, love ♥

Happy 23rd to us! ♥

29th is here again, which spells our special day. Amazing how I still anticipate the arrival of every month's 29th. And another month would be our second year! I'm really excited even though we've not planned anything just yet but because this is the longest relationship I ever had and it is with you :)

I don't know how I found you but I'm thankful that I have. Thank you for being with me through out all these times, be it good or bad. Thank you for being my wonderwall, for being there whenever I need you. Thank you for helping me solve my million and one problems whenever I come up to you. Darling, stay close, don't go. I cannot see myself with anyone but you.

I promise that I do have the biggest heart to love you with.
I love you, Jvern Ng :)

P/s: Can't wait to celebrate with you on Saturday!
P/p/s: Not forgetting, happy 23rd to bff and her ah m (act one van der Woodsen) too! How nice that we celebrate this day together every month. Also a constant reminder that we gotta pressies for our girlfriends whenever the day is approaching. Hm, me likey!

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Monday, April 27, 2009

All I need to know is that I'm something you'll be missing

Love - a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise & the lips to pucker.

I miss you gal gal :( I know you'll be like giving me that what the hell? look in reply to that. I kinda want you here with me right now. It feels horrible here, all over again. I'm just stressing myself up over nothing, nothing at all. It's what is coming and what I'm about to face that I am afraid of. I don't know, I just feel like this battle is too much for me. I can't keep fighting, going on like how I've been for the past years. I'm so so exasperated. Like I said today, if I cannot take it anymore, I will go off from here. This is where I'll leave this as it is. I cannot take it anymore.......

Hate what we spoke of today. Hate what we discussed over lunch. Hate the things I've to worry about.

(Anonymous: Keep your comments to yourself. You can go bitch about me in your MSN conversation with your bff, I don't really care. Unless necessary, or you think it is worth it, you might wanna risk leaving your crap here as a comment. I might accept it, I might delete it. Up to you :))

Y'know honestly, I just wanna know that throughout tough times like these, you won't desert me. I only wanna know that you'll help me through this no matter how hard is it gonna be for you or for me. I don't know why it aches so much here typing this, why my eyes are all watery...

Well, okay back to updates! Today:
x I woke up early
x postman ('twas a female, actually..) came by my doorstep and gave me the package, package filled with my pretty blazer!!!!
x helped Gran with her ezlink card and accompanied her to wait for her bus
x had lunch at Ajisen with bblove
x Apple red earpiece or Philips Bubbles SHE3650? - I cannot decide!
x bff came, bought food and bb walked us back to my place before leaving for home
x 'm glad bblove likes the blazer! her expression was like :S when she was trying it on
x settled down, studied and did 3 topics in less than 4 hours!
x watched Ellen, and we studied until dad came home from his jog
x bff left, we had dinner!
x tv, facebook - restaurant city, MSN conversations

Grandma, get well soon, I love you (L)

Sometimes I wish life isn't this tough. Sometimes I wish I don't have to fight to get what I want. Sometimes I wish I was a spoilt princess who gets whatever she wants without having to work for it. Sometimes I wish love is for ever. Sometimes I wish our distances could be less than 10 kilometres away from each other. Sometimes I wish I could run, run to a faraway place to stay happy. Sometimes I wish happiness isn't short-lived. Sometimes I wish you could be me for a day so you'll know why I've been/I'm worrying myself sick.

Didn't mean to have another emo post on again tonight but my life sucks right now (or rather, it is just me) as you can tell. I'm crossing my fingers and hoping that tomorrow will be much better, I will feel better and mugging with the girls would make me gay and chippy :)

Love all, goodnight.

P/s: I just realised my last movie was really long ago. Ftw Mall Cop!?
P/p/s: Two more days to 29th!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P/p/p/s: I feel green when I see happy couple, fml

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All those lovers are liars, I'd never lie to you

I never had a chance to say and I know you'd come on here to read so here it goes:

I'm sorry.

Although they are the words you don't wish to hear from me right now but I still have to say it. I'm sorry that I lied. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you the truth and having to hide. I won't let this happen again.

I'm sorry, I love you.
Forgive me, will you?

Besides that, you failed me again. No texts until you got home from lunch with them at Graze. Disappointed? I guess I am. Exasperated? Maybe I am not. Maybe I'm just giving up already. Maybe I should start living this life like I'm alone, with no one else to tell my whereabouts and text when I'm with my friends, then you'll know why I'm acting like this.

Why do I bother so much, really, tell me why, I wanna know.

I'll blog later, till then!

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Saturday, April 25, 2009

It always fascinated me how people go from loving you madly to nothing at all

You're seeing her tomorrow, can I say that I am worried for things to turn bad for us again? Can I trust you enough to know that you're not gonna give me nonsense like, leaving me alone & not telling me your whereabouts until you finally decided that the party's over and you should text/call me to check in?

The whole point is I trust you enough not to do that. Cross my fingers, you're not going to repeat the same mistake that caused my heart to break bit by bit.

Today was a great day, 'cept the burning at 34 degree weather. Despite wearing a very comfy dress, I still feel the heat. Dammit, what's wrong with you weather!?

We had lunch at TCC! Finally, my cravings for wedges are gone hehehe

Lychee Jazz
Wedges with cheese!
Seafood Aglio Olio

The pasta bb had was great. Garlic and the fresh prawns and scallops, it was fantastic. The wedges are so well fried, really love it! Looking at it now makes me drool and want some............

(the night flower scent is making my nose fucken itchy, hate it!)

Went FEP to look for the high waist shorts I was dreaming of since the day I saw it. Guess what? It is not fated to be mine. The shop is under renovation. Arrrrrgh never mind so we went on to shop but I lost the mood. I've been anticipating to get but ugh no more :( bff asked me to consider the Topshop one..but I don't know, I'll keep that in mind though.

Took a fucking hot bus to Marina Square. We were perspiring in the bus! The AC is helpless, I swear -.- Bb was still hungry and I was damn thirsty so we sat down at Quick Bite.

Original Lover

She insisted that I'm the one who was still hungry after lunch at TCC!! When I took out the camera to take pictures of her eating, she pretended like she wasn't eating hahaha damn sickening!

So who's the one who is hungry after lunch!?

Went Times bookstore and bought the books! 3 books for the price of 2! The cheapest book will be the free one :)

Cecelia Ahern's Thanks for the Memories
James Patterson's 7th Heaven
Dorothy Koomson's Goodnight, Beautiful

Obviously 7th Heaven belongs to bb hahaha I don't read such books! Two of my favourite authors, Dorothy Koomson and Cecelia Ahern :) I'm reading the book by the latter first!

After that bb went home and I went to meet my family for dinner at..


Dinner to celebrate mom's birthday in advanced 'cos on Thursday, Zel has got performance at NAFA so we're all going down to support her :) Grandma came along for dinner! Didn't snap much, was busy taking the food for everyone haha not eating! I didn't eat much, I wasn't really in the eat-a-lot mood.


We each got our own individual pots so it's quite cute. And one thing fo'sure, it's definitely much more hygenic! The soup - herbal chicken, bak kut teh and tom yam! I took the bak kut teh one, not good! I prefer the tom yam one. Herbal chicken soup has got ginseng and I can't sleep if I drink ginseng soup!

All in all, the food's quite good! There's hot station which has got fried tapioca, fried banana, rojak and popiah. The variety of dessert is quite wide as well. The fruit tart sucks, I'm still looking for great fruit tart other than the ones at SSC and Delifrance!

Mom said I should be charged at a child's price 'cos I barely ate, which is true. I walked around to get food for them more than I sat down to eat hehehe!

After that we went shopping at GAP! 30% off store-wide lasts until Sunday!!! Bought presents for godpa and Jon. Bought nothing for myself. Dammit. I was contempleting if I should get the polka dot boxer and the GAP tee :( I should've just gotten it seeeeeriously!

Okay gotta log off now, high tea with the family tomorrow. Another round of eating, omg this sucks! Fucking tired from standing and walking, I'm turning in early on a Saturday night, amazing!

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I'll never let your head hit the bed without my hand behind it

Because I wanted to check something and also to check when was the last time I did my hair before the trip with bff last week or the week before, I read hhheartbreakhotel and theklassiquecrime a little.

hhheartbreakhotel was so much happier but theklassiquecrime was so sad. Everything was sad, talking about smashed hearts and broken dreams, people who came, left without turning back to look at all and threw their rear-view mirrors away. I could sense the sadness seeing the layout again.

But bottom line is, am I really happy now? Is this what I really wanted?

but anyway p/s: thanks bb for today, luv you so much <3
p/p/s: happy birthday ^.^ whether you know this is for you or not, whatever I don't care. I hope you are as happy as you are pretending to be.

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Thursday, April 23, 2009

That's a shame that love can't make you stay

I'm so damn pissed off. I bought a striped vest for bb through a pre-order which means I've to make payment and wait for about 2-3 weeks before the item gets to me. I made payment, told the girl the transaction reference for her to check if the payment is in and all. After waiting in vain for about two weeks, I emailed her to ask about the status of the vest. GUESS WHAT? SHE DIDN'T TAKE IN MY ORDER, DIDN'T BOTHER TO EMAIL TO ASK AT ALL. Some kind of responsible seller she is huh. Okay, I would say partly it was my bad for not reading her email thoroughly before I make conclusion that I need not reply her email at all. In her email she said she needed my details which I have already given her but she needed my address which I completely missed out. But when I didn't reply her, she should have the responsibility to email me and ask, no? This is fucking fucked up. And now she said order is closed, items arrived, all mailed out and she have to refund me.

I'm not upset because she's irresponsible (duh?) but upset because i waited for something i really like in vain for weeks!

I swear, I already have bad impressions of her because 1) she is very unfriendly, 2) she is rude, 3) this incident - no responsibility. I'm not revealing what's the name of the shop or the url but if you ask me, I might tell you.

x TVRP exam guidelines
x Shimmy came for class!!!!!! (L)
x waiting for bus = HOT SUN HUMID HEAT DIE
x went Vivo City for lunch + a lil' shopping after class
x Long John Silver for lunch
x unproductive shopping but Jems bought a  F21 neon pink 'I ♥ my boyfriend' tunic
x took train home, met bff, bought food up to my place
x watched telly, played Pet Society, watched Ellen :D
x bff left before dinner, I went to rest/talk to bb


I've been looking for a new phone. This Nokia 6500S has been with me for a year now but it is such a pain in the ass! Memory card cannot function, hangs once in every while, battery life: 2 days if I don't text/call often, dropped it a lot of times, music player sucks. I want a new phone with WIFI hehe can go on MSN anytime anywhere :D

I got my eye on a few...

Samsung F480
Nokia E75
Nokia E63

I don't know if I should get a QWERTY keypad one or a touchscreen one. There's both good and bad reviews for both. I don't mind either one, as long as they have the functions I want in a phone! But because I want something different, not something that one of my family members already have. Che is using Samsung F480 now. Mom's gonna get Nokia 5800 XpressMusic. So I think I will take Nokia E75! Hehe plus it is available in red, black and copper yellow! RED! RED!! RED!!!

I'm feeling the ache... :( everywhere. Mom said it is caused by insufficient rest/sleep. I'm going to sleep early tonight, my eyes are still very painful but not as bad as yesterday. THANK GOD MR LIM CANCELLED TOMORROW'S CLASS! Time for me to sleep in until it's time for me to get up :) meeting bb tomorrow going over to her place for lunch and dinner after that ^^ yay finally some time with bb. Even though I see her everyday but we don't talk much, neither do we get to spend much time together. It's been two weeks since I last spent some alone time with her. Time really flies man..

OH one more thing before I go, I JOINED PLURK.COM! I was asked to join by Zoe but I didn't get down to do it. Today I finally did! It's so cute, there's some kinda karma points system and cute emoticon! So if you have plurk / twitter, follow me (that's what they are called) on Plurk or Twitter!

The wonders of Adobe Photoshop

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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The breath between our lips when we kiss is something I hope I never have to miss


I love gossip guys.
I love vanity fair.
I have all of the common addictions.
I don't like that Louie Vuitton Monogram Pailletes Speedy.
I'm starting to like Kristewart a little more each time I see her as herself, not as Bella Swan.
I miss partying, getting drunk, laughing at everything & drinking 'til the last drop.

So hi, i had a fucking boring Wednesday. How was yours? Oh I had a interesting evening though. We were this close to getting into a fight but i deliberately replied her really slowly and also at the same time to calm myself down and clear my mind. And then it was resolved. All is well again :) Oh and one more thing, the surprise failed. I'm trying again though, probably tomorrow?? The sleazy song continues, seriously omg it is keeeeeling me! Jems and I imagined all of us being preggy and being mothers. We used the sweater as the baby bump hahaha it was so hilarious! Jems said she could imagine me as preggy woman and a mother. Aww :)

I forget to mention it's our cai hong jie jie (rainbow sister which is what we always call Jems because she likes rainbow!) and her boyflen's 3rd year anniversary! HAPPY THIRD YEAR TO YOU BOTH LOVEBIRDS <3 damn happy for you jems :)

Tomorrow is television and radio production class - boring. But for the important topics and exam guidelines, i'm going for class, fo'sure. After class, lunch with Jems if she's not meeting her ah fai then home to meet bff for Starbucks! I've been craving for it since I don't know when. Friday will be spent with my gal gal :) she always have new pet names, sorry bee hahaha but i love giving you pet names hahaha!

Before I leave, I'll leave you guys with two very funny videos.
A video tweet from Ellen & her mom to MCHammer
Ellen's bathroom concert series with Jennifer Hudson

Enjoy and goodnight, have a great Thursday!

but I believe true, deep love is always worth fighting for..

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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

I can't wait until I breathe flames that burn every precious memory what I'm yearning for right now.
First person I see in the morning when I open my eyes, last person I see at night before I go to sleep. Perfect scenario, no? With you, it definitely is.

On Monday.....
We sat right in front, under Sivam's nose. Made me feel so good! I paid attention, didn't talk much, took down notes and did the two activities! Amazing :)

I bought this new portable Hello Kitty fan, mainly because the weather is a killer I really need one, it could be of real good use these days! It was only $3 at the night market downstairs! I brought it to school so it could be of use when I walk to school or from school. Jems played with it and her hair for stucked on the fan!!!! O.O


You probably think it is impossible but NO WAY! It was stucked right inside. I swear I didn't know it was so serious, I was laughing my ass off at her reaction it was really funny! After she struggled for a good fifteen minutes, I tried helping her remove her hair from the fan without hurting her at all. Guess what this impatient girl did!?!!!


She is nuts, I tell you. It was a lot of hair loss. We got the whole class' attention unknowingly. Someone suggested her to use lighter to burn it -.- thanks much, handsome boy, might as well ask her burn her whole head! And just so you know, he was sitting right at the back of the class. Just imagine the scene in class.......

Bb was doing project with her groupmates and after we were done with class, we left for lunch together. Went Tiong Bahru Plaza again for Qi Ji! We are certainly addicted hehehe

Mine: Mee Rebus

Rojak, to share

Jems' & bff's Nasi Lemak



Our table looked like there was some kind of food feast or celebration going on with so much food!! But we were all fairly quiet. Stressed over monetary issues, and exams. :( this really sucks. I can't put my mind away from this. Times like that just make me wish that I was some rich brat from a rich ass family.

After lunch, we all went home! Bff & I went to the night market and bought the fan. Doraemon for Jac & Hello Kitty for bff :)

On Tuesday......
which is today. Other than writing notes and snapping shots of the slides as there are too much to copy and Padhman was clearly rushing, I kept hearing Jems go arrrgh whenever someone sings that sleazy song. "Two plus two equals vagina" "What time is it? It's vagina" SOME KIND OF SICK SONG THIS IS!?!!! Omg and Silas heard it, Silas told Miguel and almost all the guys in front of us knows about this whole shit. Tsk tsk INFLUENCE!

The assignment for JNB is out and I got F. Good written on my paper. The first thing came to my mind, it's Fucking Good. HAHAHAHAHAHA and the whole bunch of them who heard me and also got F. Good, "I ALSO GOT FUCKING GOOD!" and burst out into fits of laughter. I'm a big influence too hahaha nah just kidding!

Padhman went through with us the important topics to be tested for the exam and we were dismissed! Had ice-cream while walking to the train station. Jems went off first while bff, Marc and I went back home together. Bff & I alighted after Marc did and we went to the bookstore to check out the organisers. I didn't know they got such nice ones! After that we went to the night market again and bff bought snacks for herself and my mummy! So schweet of you ^^ (and my mama said thanks, she thought you were coming up to our place hahaha!)

I'm starting to write my notes for the exams already. I'm really anxious and scared that I do not do well this time so I've decided to start doing my notes early. Next week, which is study week for us, we're gonna go study together. Productively, may I emphasize. I really wanna do well this time round, don't wanna let bb & my mom down.

Tutorial starts at 12.15pm tomorrow but I'm going down early to surprise the girlfriend and also to have lunch with her! Hehe i'm sure she won't read this because she is fast asleep right now in dreamland filled with candies :)

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does it mean anything to you?

is being happy feels like nothing else would matter to me at all as long as I have you?
is being happy means knowing that someone like you truly cares about me?
is being happy feels a lot lighter?

why happier, better days are so short while bad times lasts so long, so damn long?

p/s: on sunday night, i saw a Mitsubishi & i thought it was you.

ok bai skl naoz effing late thanx to ze rain

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Monday, April 20, 2009

In this world of loneliness, I see your face

I have a lot of photos so I will cut down on talking / words okay. There's tutorial at's not like I will be there on time but at least I try to be there on time, not later than break time.

On Saturday....
The supp paper? Don't talk about it. Ruined my morn, wasted my time. I will rant and complain to Anna Oh in the email, hmph! Went Lot 1 with Shim and we saw......


We were like two losers trying to see what they are doing and this is what I captured hahaha there were a lot of people! Can die in there, seriously it's so packed! Michelle Chia is really old, can tell from her face. Heard from mama that Pornsak carries his boss really well that's why he's in almost every entertainment show.... Hm?

Bb and Jac came, Shim left. Bought plasters and socks! Everlast was killing me. My feet is filled with blisters now :( super painful! Had quick lunch at Long John Silver and took a bus down to Far East Plaza!

Guess what we had again?
yes, SLICE!

They should really pay me for advertising for them, plzzzzz


Went to walk around, Jac bought a black vest and I was contempleting whether to get the high waist shorts or not. :( I've been thinking about it until now...... BUT I ended up buying the pair of shoes I wanted since last week haha I went to the same shop, look at the same pair again - which means I really like it so I bought it without hesitation!


I bought grey, amazingly. I don't know why but I just prefer the grey to the black one. The black one looks like ___ ________ wearing it to school!! :( Ok next was CK Tang, Lucky Plaza, Paragon, Cathay for dinner at Aston's!

A jug of root beer
Bb: Soup of the Day - Mushroom soup!
Jac: Spicy Chicken Spaghetti with Soup of the Day

Bb: Black Pepper Chicken with Mashed Potato + Fries

Me: Prime Ribeye with Mashed Potato + Onion Rings

We had so much to eat. I could barely finish mine but it is really good, honestly. Good + cheap! The queue is worth it, totally. Guess how much our bill came up to?

Fucking $36.20 for the three of us with so much food!

After dinner, we walked around, went to the flea downstairs but there were closing.. Oh well! Saw nothing nice anyway. Walked from Cathay down to Heeren for ice-cream at Mac's :) Chocolate Swirl again hehehe! While walking, we stopped by at John Little and saw very nice lingerie! Pierre Cardin and Young Hearts' :) They were like having sale or something. Just $12 for one set. It's very pretty but I was really trying to control myself from overspending cos I want the high waist more than the lingerie heheh I'm gonna tell mama and maybe she'll buy it for me! I've been hinting her about the La Senza ones muahahaha and she seems to be giving the nod already!


Heeren, Cineleisure. Bumped into Chanel, Sass and Shyan! I totally forgot there was the class gathering there hahaha never thought I'd bump into them there. NICE HAWT PHOTOS AH SASS HAHAHAH I JUST KNEW YOU'D HAVE SOME PORNO IN THAT ROLL OF FILM! Nice bumping into them anyway, it was a total surprise :)

We all got really restless so Jac took a bus home first while Bb sent me home. She wanted to see the night market and have Thai shark's fin! But I was REALLY exhausted from all the walking and laughing + the pain from my blister on my feet. So we sat down at the void deck to talk, like the good ol' days.....

Yknow, I still love it when you hold my hand out of nowhere occasionally. I know that doesn't come from you often, so I really appreciate it when you do. Luv u bb <3 ;>

On Sunday.....
SAW THE BOOTIES OF MY DREAMS AT A LOCAL SHOE BOUTIQUE AND I REALLY LOVE IT! Spent the whole evening hinting mom about it and she just told me to clear my shoe wardrobe and she'll consider if she should buy it for me! OH YES OH YES OH YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Zel couldn't stand me either. I was telling her how much I wanted that pair of booties, since when and how I can wear it with that high waist shorts though not the high waist shorts of my dreams.... She wanted to strangle me so much I could tell on her face! Hahahaha we went to Hougang Mall for ban mian for late lunch. Got home only at 4pm and went straight to the books. Did revision, skipped dinner, went to the night market and blabbered about the booties to mom & dad heard it, he started his naggings about how I should STOP buying shoes. I will never have enough shoes bags clothes accessories and everything nice!

OK I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE My eyes are damn painful I shall blog about today tomorrow ok goodnight world!

p/s: your sudden 'love you!' before hanging up this afternoon got me smiling like a fool even until now.

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